Baggage Minimal, Please.

Over the past month and a half I thought I had been dating some one quite wonderful. He seemed caring, smart, funny and stable; it was a relief to meet someone so lovely.

Til we got comfortable, this is where he started making comments about how many of my friends were male. He has an issue with me being friends with the person we met through. And in a bad series of events, his ex-girlfriend some how got my phone number and started harassing me.

It’s fine and dandy for me because harassing ex’s tend over-exaggerate the truth. She told me they were married. He told me they were never married and he wasn’t with her. When it came to the trust issues, I let him know that if he had an issue trusting me we were never going to work. I am a honest person and will tell what happen if someone asks. Things were fine after.

UNTIL, my old friend sent me a message saying he wanted to have coffee. I have not seen this friend in 7 years. The trouble about this was that the guy I was dating went through my phone. I was quite upset by the fact that he did that, but he made it seem more like I did something wrong. I was confused about it because I never went out with my friend, therefore there is not reason to be upset with me.

Not until his ex moved back to the state did I realize what was going on. Once she moved back (with his children) did quit talking to me. Honestly, I am quite fine with it because I am not in the place in my life for a relationship.

The thing I learned about all this is, if there are problems before they say your are their boyfriend/girlfriend it is not worth the effort. The beginning should never be a struggle. And their baggage should be minimal.

Time Can Only Tell..

Looking back on the past as I do at least once a week I realized one important thing; time tells you everything. Its hard to deny it. As I sat in the car with a past flame this came to mind… “I swear that I thought I loved him at some point but how?”

See he indeed made his place in my history and I surely made an impact on him but now that I think about it..I never really loved him. In the situation I was in with him I think I loved that he met a lot of my check list but I never really loved him. My taste has changed since I met him and so have my view on him. I do care for him as a friend but nothing more. The way he was acting it seems to be more.

Love lives are like clothes, you can like the feeling of the material or love the look but what someone really need is something that is their unique fashion and fits like a glove. Otherwise, you will be out of you comfort zone.

Need Sometime To Waste Time.

Earlier this week someone was telling me about how they were asked if the person they were dating was the one. They told me that they knew that person wasn’t, which sparked a idea. It is something I have thought about a lot.

I told this person dating is like school you must learn so many lessons before you graduate. Every person that has made an impact in my life has been a lesson in the end. Without knowing it we take those lessons and apply them to future relationships. Some people see dating people who you know are not the one is wasted time, I see it as time well spent.

 How well do you think you most relationship would have been handled if you had not learn things from others?  With all honesty, I think my most recent relationships would have been a complete train wreak; as would I, in general, as a person. Thank your ex’s even if you don’t speak to them because if it wasn’t for them you wouldn’t have learned how to handle certain situations. 

The years teach much which the days never knew.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson