Reward System

This week an old friend as me an excellent question about relationships;

”..what if you met an awesome guy and he just poured out his trust on you totally, do you automatically trust him?”

No. I see relationships as simple reward system when it comes to trust. In the beginning you want to give them some trust, but not all. If you don’t have any trust in the beginning you are pretty much doomed, but if you trust completely you are pretty much putting your heart near a paper shredder and hoping it doesn’t fall in.

See, if you don’t give someone trust it makes it harder for your partner to doing things with out you flipping your lid. I understand if they do something that you find less then pleasing and you get upset. I have been there, but I have also been in the position where I just do nothing and get in trouble. If you can’t try to trust someone in a relationship it is because in reality you don’t trust yourself in a relationship (that is unless you have a reason to trust that particular person).

Every relationship I have entered since I was abused was a risk of not knowing if it would happen again. I trusted every person afterward enough to proceed with the relationship. Most importantly, I trusted myself to be observant enough leave a relationship if I though it was going to happen again.